Anime News Letter Season 1:
ANL Classic

Season 1, Issue 3

The Animé News Letter #3
The Every So Often News Letter for Otaku!!!

President/Reviews: Archmage Shade/Seanma/Prof. Duffy/Lord of the Dice
Vice President/Rumiko Takahashi Correspondent: Ukyo Kounji/Goddess of the Spatula
Lowly Reporter: Purin/Bryoga/King of Kawaii, POKéMON Researcher
Secret Police: Cyber Kitty/=^o^=

Sent to: Erika Lt./Lum/Ifurita, Jake, Mr. Saotoby, Happodan/Dr. Tofu, "The Secretary"/OA Man, Kirk, Alienman/MangaMan/”It’s a me, a Mario”, Lord Geos, Shampoo, and Thor the God of Accounting.
Members in: Maine 6, California 2, unknown 2

If you know anyone who wants this, contact us at ukyokounji@hotmail.com

“Ah... Der Octöberfest. The smell of Bratwurst is in the air. And of course, our favorite NON-alcoholic drinks. *Swigs from a stein of Dr. Pepper* So traveler, won’t you sit down and join us? We have some reviews, a fight between Ifurita and Sephiroth, a monkey and an organ grinder, a fight between the cast of Ranma 1/2 and Cyber Kitty, a slam session on Digimon, and information on the Evil Lord Mew and his minions. On another note, I have a friend who’s off to China! I wonder if he’ll fall into any cursed pools?”
- Archmage Shade
P.S. Alienman, we lost your, um, review, sorry, could you mail us another?

Animé Review: Appleseed
Lum's Rating: ****
Running Time of movie: 68 minutes
This movie takes place after World War III. It opens with a police cop's wife (who is sick of her perfect life and is convinced that she has nothing to live for) throws herself out her apartment window. The cop (who's name is Karen) rushes in just as his wife plunges to her death. He is of course crushed, but agrees with his wife that there is nothing to live for. He decides to help the criminals stir up some mayhem (mayhem? what the heck am I talking about?! MURDER is more like it!) and perhaps prove his point. Then, it fades out into the logo and some cool music for about 2 minutes and then fades back into a hostage scenario. Officers Dunan Nats and (half cyborg) Buliarous Hehatonecles are ordered to save the hostages from the evil A.J Sebastion. Karen, is of course, helping this bad dude and I'm gonna stop rambling on now because if I talk anymore, I'm gonna ruin the movie! It's a great movie, but not as good as some of the one's that I've seen. There's lots of cussing so now you can't say that I didn't warn you!

Battle Square: Ifurita vs. Sephiroth
Ifurita: *walks in, crowd cheers*
Sephy: *walks in, crowd boos (except for Purin and a small army of jigglypuff, who are cheering VERY loud), he wades up through the crowd, killing people with his sword*
Shade: Mr. Sephiroth, please get back in the square!
Sephy: Sorry! It’s a bad habit, been a problem for a while, sorry!
Ifurita: Let’s get it on! *throws a fire spell, little effect*
Sephy: HAHAHA!!! Take this, CHOCO-MOG!!!! *A mog riding a chocobo charge into Ifurita, hurting her*
Ifurita: Fool! Now I have that power! CHOCO-MOG!!! *Sephy got run over! He’s hurt bad!*
Shade: Ifurita wins!!! Now, fight me!!! *Jumps in to the arena*
Ifurita: Fine *Throws ice*
Shade: That’s foolish! I absorb magic, now, taste this!!! Cherry Blossom!!! *A mass of Cherry Blossoms surround Ifurita*
Ifurita: Huh?
Shade: Shadow Ultimate Technique...
Ukyo: What’s this? A new technique?
Shade: Atma Fury Death Synthesis!!! *it turns to night, Shade’s blade glows blue, he charges, jumps and falls a foot short of Ifurita with his sword stabbed in to the ground. A large explosion shoots Ifurita out of the Battle Square*
Ukyo: Umm... Seanma-honey’s the winner!!! And he wins a date with me, Ukyo Kounji.
Shade: Oh dear gods... *runs far, far away, to a galaxy, long, long ago*
Purin and Jigglypuffs: BOOO!!! WE WANT OUR MONEY BACK!!!

The Monkey and the Music Meister
A man has a music box, and he is playing it. A monkey dances beside it. Now, we have a poll: Do you (A) give them money, (B) kick the monkey, (C) splash the monkey with warm water to get him to turn back to his true form, (D) Go beat up Ifurita for defeating Sephiroth, or (E) beat up Shade for being dumb? E-mail us, and we’ll post the results in the next issue!

Another Poll
Mr. Saotoby wants us to have a poll to see what people like as their Pokémon and why? E-mail us, and that too will get posted.

Digimon Slam-a-thon
“Hi, I’m Agumon!” Shade smacks him.
“SHUT UP!!! We don’t care. You are a rip-off of Pokémon.”
“No we’re not!!! I’m twice as good as Charmander, and I don’t even have a flame on my tail!”
“GO, Charmander! Ember!!!” Agumon is turned into weinersnitzel. “So much for that, ah... satisfying.”
CYBER KITTY ALARM!!! =^o^= “AHH!!! MUST CENSOR!!!”
“You’re angry...”
“Of course I am!!!”
“Hiryu Shoten Ha!!!” Cyber Kitty gets caught up in a hurricane.
“SHHHHIIIIIIIIIITTT!!!!”
“Bye, Kitty...”

Information on Lord Mew
Lord Mew is an evil Pokémon who wants to destroy all trainers. So far, Shade has gotten a few trainers to help him. We could always use more, so join the FireRpg today to fight creatures like Lord Mew and make new friends! This is where I got all the non-boy scout subscribers from!
Lord Mew: Species-Mew, Level-25, Age-16, Eye Color-green/gray.

Endorsements:
www.maxpages.com/firerpg
FireRpg: Let the Battle Begin! (A POKéMON on-line RPG)

www.anipike.com
The Animé Turnpike, The #1 source on every Animé

www.pythonline.com
Monty Python On-line

The Right Stuf Catalog
A great catalog to find animé in (to order a catalog, pay $3 by calling 1-800-338-6827) on the web at www.rightstuf.com

If you'd like to contribute anything, contact us at ukyokounji@hotmail.com or whizshade@hotmail.com

Back Issues:
Issue 1 - The Phantom Dentist
Issue 2 - The Sequel